existence

by nick nelson

edward evans did not get much mail, not even junk mail. but one day he received a letter with the return address of “department of existence.” he opened it. it contained a single sheet of neatly folded paper, with the letterhead of the department of existence, and a return envelope marked “postage will be paid by recipient.” the single sheet read: please justify your existence in twenty-five words or less. and added in bolder type: failure to comply will result in consequences. below that were several blank lined spaces for the twenty-five words or less. edward wrote: i don’t cause any trouble. i try not to get in anybody’s way. i like all persons. he added them up and there were seventeen words. so he added: thank you very much. have a nice day. that made twenty-four words, so he had one to spare. he went to the post office and handed the letter to a clerk. * what did you think of edward’s response? on a scale of zero (hopeless) to ten (perfect) how would you rate it? do you think you could have done better?